My “Holy Sh*t I Got It All Wrong” Moment – aka Why You Should Stop Selling Your Expertise

The first few paragraphs of this article may be a bit on the woo-woo side. Rest assures, I haven’t gone off the deep end. While I use my own experience to illustrate the point, I will show you why you have to STOP SELLING YOUR EXPERTISE – and make yourself so UNIQUE in the marketplace that you can command a high fee AND get more clients.

Get comfy, it’s not an “easy” read. But the ONE QUESTION and ONE DARE (+ 3 FEAR FACTORS) will change the way you market your biz – saving you a load of time and money. Worth it.

Let’s begin…

I get a lot of “downloads” and aha moments during and after my Monday yoga. I was told that I have a mercury line on my palm and it’s like a “two-way radio with the divine.” This week, whatever out there (the divine, the higher power, the universe, the angels, the cantaloupe widget) decided to just whack me with a 2×4, after enduring a painful weekend of “gestation”, aftermath of energy work and crazy dreams (which apparently flushed out a load of self-doubts and self-criticism.)

“Dude, this whole ‘online marketing’ expertise thing –
you got it all ASS BACKWARD!!”

Say what? You mean I should NOT be “selling” my expertise in online marketing?

“Stop hiding behind this façade of ‘online marketing’, and
really show the world what is IN YOUR BONES!!”

Holy mackerel. With a lot of aftershock,
I set down to write this as I process the whole idea…

Let’s rewind a few days back. I had a coaching session with my mentor and she looked up my Human Design astro chart (apologies if I get the terms wrong, I am a newbie.) I told her my birth date and time, and she looked me up. A few minutes of silence, then she asked me “Are you SURE you have the date and time right?” Geez, what a question… it’s MY birthday of course I got it right!!

Turns out I am a “reflector” – whatever the term means, less than 1% of the population is in this category (rare, good stuff). Long story short, as a “reflector”, I have the capacity to take in everything someone threw at me – with no judgment, conclusion and preconception – put it all together and SYNTHESIZE the “raw materials” into ULTRA-CLARITY.

Me, in its entirety, screamed, holy Moses. I thought I was just a weirdo who doesn’t seem to have a strong attachment to anything like everybody else (except my nightly piece of dark chocolate!) Really, most of the time, sh*t doesn’t stick with me. I make space for my clients to create their biz their way, yet I doubted if I “should” be doing more “prescriptive” stuff to steer them a certain direction… (aaaah, what a relief to know that it’s actually my GIFT coming through! And no, I never push my clients into “my way.”)

I thought, when I spit out an ULTRA CLEAR PICTURE of how a potential client can design her business based on her personality, big vision and ideal lifestyle just 20 minutes into her Breakthrough Session (with no bias, no “should’s” according to my opinion) – it’s just “what I do.” Like, no big deal – even though the client has been confused and struggling for the past 9 months… and expressed “wonderment.”

I have been HIDING. I have been DISCOUNTING my talent.
I didn’t own up to it so I don’t have to stand up for it. I CHICKENED OUT.

Duh, it’s just me playing small. C’mon, Danielle Laporte sold her single “Fire Starter Session” for $1k way back when for that kind of laser-focused badass clarity!! It turns out, for all my talk about “owning your gifts” and helping my clients to step up and craft their unique offerings, I was not seeing what I have right under my nose! Double duh.

But that’s not all. My mentor also did a hand analysis with me so we folded in my gift marks. Again, long story short, my schtick is “Poetic Perception Materialized” – I can dive in deep to find the SOUL of my client’s business and then make it happen. I can make sh*t happen in a way that is most aligned with the person’s CORE.

“Happen”, as in, money in the bank. Not just “love and light”, “rainbows and unicorns”. Because you don’t come to me to “feel good.”

“Happen”, as in “Getting 9 Clients in 3 Weeks”. As in, “Getting From ‘Just a Dream’ To a New Coaching Biz in 12 Weeks”.

* note – in my book, “making things happen” is not just a plan and a bunch of how-to’s (although my clients get a lot of those). The biggest impact comes from overcoming fears and money mindset blocks to remove obstacles and supercharge the actions.

That, being a “reflector” with multiple intuitive, creative and wealth gift marks, plus my ability to “make things happen” (that is actually my 3 of Diamond birth card and my 10 years of project management experience in the digital marketing industry) is my SUPERPOWER. I can tease out all the pieces for a client, get to the DEEP CORE of what she is about, and come out with a direction and design for her business that makes her heart sing. That’s my superpower. I am claiming it and using it.

“Why is this clarity so important? Why can’t I just build that damn website now?” You may ask.

Yeah, I got a lot of that. You see, without that kind of deep clarity, your words and actions won’t be at their most powerful. You will have doubts about where you are going (it will happen and is the cost of doing business!) You will spin your wheels and spend a load of time and money on things that don’t support you (nor matter.) You may even go down the road to build a business only to realize that you don’t like what you do a year down the line and you have to tear down everything and re-build from scratch. Spend a few weeks to dig deep, put in the work (which may not “look like a lot” but trust me, all parts of you are working OT) and it will pay off hugely.

Why does OWNING YOUR GIFT matter in business? How does it make you money?

My SUPERPOWER and what it delivers – the kind of rapid clarity for a business – is way more unique and appealing than my EXPERTISE – online marketing – which everybody claims to know something about.

Consider law of supply and demand… Which one is more UNIQUE? Which one has fewer (much fewer) competitions? Which one can go for a higher price and still give me more clients (imagine the time and money saved. Imagine the happiness and fulfillment gained)? Hands down, SUPERPOWER. Triple duh.

Out of the closet – I am NOT selling “online marketing”.

It is logical deduction, nothing “rainbows and unicorns” about it.

What About Your “Expertise”?

BUT wait, it doesn’t mean you have to toss your expertise out the window! Your expertise is what makes things happen for your clients. It is still the tool the you deliver a good portion of your “promise.”

For me, “marketing” is what make things happen for my clients – simply put, spread the message and sell the goods. I need that tool to help my clients achieve results. It’s integral to my toolkit, it’s just not what drives the car.

Many clients who come to me have already done courses and trainings on marketing. But things were just not happening. So that “expertise” called “online marketing” alone is not the key to the solution. I hold the key, and it will be a crime not to share it.

How to Nail Your Superpower

Finding your superpower takes time, commitment, effort and the willingness to step out of your own way. You may have to turn your world upside down to see what you were unable to see. You many need help to open up to what was not apparent to you and be humble enough to accept and admit that you didn’t know that part about yourself. You probably need to overcome preconception and judgment of what is “appropriate” to say in order to fully step up and claim the hell out of it.

Claiming their superpowers has done wonders to my clients’ confidence and has added much clarity to their communication (e.g. on website and other marketing materials) on so many levels – so much so that for almost every client I (insist to, because it’s not easy work) go through the “superpower statement” exercise at some point during our work together.

ASK: What WISDOM am I here to give the world?

To communicate your superpower, you need to cut through the jargons and the superficial wordings – don’t let them become your prison bars that limit your possibilities. Buzzwords are tempting, but they make you lazy.

Look closely into your interactions with your gold-star clients. Look into your process in helping clients get results. What are you most proud of? What do they identify as the AHA moments, from time to time? In what ways you create breakthroughs for them that other coaches/programs fail?

Think about what is easy for you that surprises others. Consider what you “ended up” doing with most of your clients. What is near and dear to your heart? What achievement in your work you are most proud of, and how did you get there? And what does your GUT tell you?

What are you secretly denying about yourself?

Let the first iteration of your superpower come out of YOUR BEING, from your Heart & Guts – even if it’s a mash up of words and doesn’t make a whole lot of grammatical sense. It can even be pictures, doodling and collages! Let your intuition take over and don’t try to use your brain to “make it sound marketing-kosher” – when you get to the essence, you can massage the words.

The first iteration of my superpower is “Poetic Perception Materialized” – just that, three words. Then I ask myself, what does that mean? Then I flush it out: I explore a lot of mindset, fear and deep stuff with my clients – within the context of their businesses – using my highly intuitive and empathetic gifts that lead to ultra-clarity within a short time. After we nailed their “schtick” that is aligned with their very core, I then help them translate and apply this knowledge into practical strategies and tactics to build their businesses. My superpower is all about { inner game + outer work = results } Because of the alignment, my clients make progress much faster and with more ease than just “muscling through a to-do list” without seeing what really is going on “inside.”

DARE: Lose the Security Blanket Called “Expertise”

house money“Expertise” like “online marketing” and “weight loss” etc. – a dime a dozen.

Terms and jargons that are tossed around without much thought usually have one advantage – people “get” what you do at first glance. But that is before they ask, why you? There is a load of [insert expertise] experts out there. Comparison and price shopping ensues. You may sell, but you are swimming upstream. And you may never come out ahead because you have to stay “competitive” in your pricing and you end up charging mediocre fee for a mediocre biz.

Sure, claim your expertise, and use it to your advantage (it is a handy marketing tool). But…

  • Don’t let your expertise define you. You are more than “digestive expert”, “weight loss expert” or “emotional eating” expert. Would you let a “tool” define you?
  • Don’t hide behind “expertise”. Picking an expertise is easy. It’s like choosing a sandwich from a menu. It tells me a bit, but not a whole lot. If you stop at your “expertise”, you risk forever hiding behind a label instead of letting yourself come through completely in the work you do.

See how your Superpower and your expertise can join forces to create a unique offering.

The FEAR Factor

“Lose the security blanket” – much easier said than done, even if you have all the intention to do so because it’s freakin’ SCARY! No fault of yours. It took me a few years to get here and I am still working on it. Let’s fast track your progress by first identifying the fears that may be holding you back from fully stepping up, be seen and be celebrated for your gift:

Fear of Inadequacy

Sticking to the “tried and true” shields you from putting yourself out there. Maybe you think “YOU” is not good enough to be the entire business. Or, you are afraid that if you do put all of “YOU” out there and still come out short, you face the undeniable and scary “truth” that you are indeed not good enough. And your protective ego (aka, the itty bitty shitty committee in your head) would not let that happen, right?

What is the worst that can happen, if you give it a shot and it doesn’t work out? Is a bruised ego worth holding all your untapped potential back?

Fear of Change

Maybe you have “claimed” your expertise and everything is plugging along even though deep down you KNOW there is something bigger for you that you are afraid to let lose. Changing your direction, how you do your work, how you market your business or with whom you work and how you deliver your services can trigger a lot of resistance if the Fear of Change is your primary fear.

What are you really holding onto?

Fear of Being Vulnerable

Your fear of being criticized may be holding you back from claiming something that is “off the beaten path.” What if people don’t “get it”? What if I step up and they don’t like me anymore? What if I change direction and my list unsub in droves? What if I say something controversial and the internet trolls attack me?

Do you want to be “liked” by people who don’t resonate with the REAL you by stuffing yourself in a box?

Almost no one has problem with plain vanilla ice cream. But most won’t pay a premium for that either. On the other hand, chili dark chocolate ice cream with pink Himalayan salt is “exotic” and sells for a premium. Not everyone may like that, but people who do are willing to pay for it. Do you want to go premium? Are you “gourmet”?

* to learn more about the 7 primary fears and how to release them, check out this SELF-guided program.

As I hone in on my superpower, I don’t need that much time to tap into my intuitive gifts to help people find the soul their your business AND show them how to make it happen. One session is all you need to get the clarity and the big picture plan. With this kind of results, I have been told many times to charge for the My Biz My Way Breakthrough Session. (

Truth – I am a bit scared. As I plug through my Fear of being Vulnerable, why not take this opportunity to grab it for FREE while you can, before I work up the guts and make you pay for it (which won’t take that long)?

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